Overthought.

It's the need for warmth when you're shaking too badly to function.
It's imagining everything ending badly when it's all going well.
It's the moment of hearing bad news and refusing to believe.
It's the best thing that happened that turns to the worst.
It's thinking of the end at the beginning.

Walk away.

I went for a walk to nowhere to sit alone and let my thoughts explode...

So human, even though a part doesn't want to be; isn't that why I found myself out here in the first place? And still, even though it's beautiful as it is - lonely - I'm praying for someone to find me here, maybe someone who was looking for loneliness too, and we'll be lonely together. Not lonely though. Alone. Distinct from the rest of the world.

This place I cannot describe. I'll try - it is a breeze, stirring something deep inside yet only just brushing the surface. It is hot and desolate with an icy clear beauty. The empty sky. A stark background to grey-green leaves that end like they've been cut, just where the white-yellow sand begins.


...proof that I can't write on demand.

XIII ways to fall.

Falling:

1. Asleep
2. Down
3. Over
4. Flat
5. Apart
6. Back
7. Behind
8. Through
9. Away
10. Out
11. In (love)
12. For you
13. To pieces

Let go.

She smells like vanilla and petals,
Her mouth the sweetness of apples,
She is the dream, the promise,
All softness and easy perfection,
Everything he wanted or needed,
Or even thought she could be,

Yet he is done with her so quick,
Surely it was a nightmare,
Or something in the way of madness,
He will be surprised to learn,
How quickly she can step aside,
Before he tries to walk away first.

Lost you.

It hurts that you know exactly who I am, even now.

You recognise every flicker of emotion
You comprehend my every movement
You understand my sighs and smiles
The way I am in every moment

It hurts that I don't know you in any way, anymore.

Ghost.

Alive
And then
A gasp like exhaustion

Glass shatters
Life pending
And smoke drifts

Rising
A wraith
A wisp of thought

Curling back
Returning
Home?

Hands reaching
Pores leaking
Screaming

Smoke swept away
Weightless
Weightless on the wind

Grey like no thought
Gone
But not forgotten